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Sunday, 2 October 2011



Angry German Shepherd
: photo by Josh Plueger/US Air Force, 15 February 2010 (USAF)

The Fear of the Other
is what puts those

dogs on guard

and the spiked Ken-L Ration
is what puts them
back off it

from 35, 1976

German Shepherd Dog: photo by Lewis Collard, 23 August 2008


H.L. Heinz Co. Ken-L Ration logo
: image by Yakuman, 26 February 2011


ACravan said...

As avid viewers of Cesar Milan's Dog Whisperer television program and readers of Beyond The Pale, we thank you for Yin/Yang. As parents of a pair of miniature longhaired dachshunds who fear Nothing (except, apparently, in Edie's case, an unconscious sense of the danger of fire; I have no idea where that comes from), I wish I knew the secret of their self-security. The two dogs here are beautiful, especially the top one, to whom it could be said "you're "beautiful when you're angry." Curtis

TC said...

Curtis, The one on top is a military attack dog. They are trained to fly through the air and lock their jaws into the flesh of a human being. Preferably a Terrorist, of course, but really almost anyone will do. The bite of a German Shepherd Dog has a force of 238 pounds. Last year, for the transgression of walking past an outdoor cafe where two dames were drinking and talking while their unleashed hounds awaited a victim, I was badly bit by a German Shepherd. The vicious cur did indeed hurtle through the air, lock in and throw me to the pavement in one very impressive piece of shock aggression. Nerve damage in right leg, permanent. While I lay dazed and bleeding on the sidewalk, the gentle owners, presumably responsible for having "trained" this beast, disappeared from the scene with their darling guided weapon, mumbling "he's never done that before..."

No one enjoys being The Other.

Nothing against dachsunds. Another brand of creature entirely.

u.v.ray. said...

Never been attacked by a dog.

But I have been attacked by a Chimpanzee. But that is another story.

The other day at the train station I saw a splendidly muscular Staffordshire Bull Terrier hiding behind his owner's legs, peering sheepishly at a baby King Charles Spaniel.

ACravan said...

The owners of the dog who attacked you must be really sick people. Curtis

TC said...


Nah, just typical citizens of Our Town.

(They were already on the cell phone to their lawyer even as they faded into the pedestrian blur with their lethal quadruped.)


I am told that monkey attacks are not uncommon in certain cities in India. I had this information from a gentlemen who in his youth had been the victim of such an attack. He had had recovered well enough, by the time I heard the story, to acquire an American doctorate, learn to transport duty free Jack Daniels back home on his visits, and be hired by Microsoft.

Is that a happy ending?

u.v.ray. said...

That one is a happy ending, indeed, Tom.

As for my own experience, however; I was not in India. I was on a British high street.

The animal was one of a group of famous monkies from a TV advert. It broke free and made a bee-line for me.

I wasn't bitten and it was probably playing. But they are a strong beast, especially when they want to throw you about.

I am told chimps can possess the strength of about 5 men.

u.v.ray. said...

* Monkeys.

I hate spelling mistakes.

TC said...

Well, after the Animals came... the Monkees.

aditya said...

Hello Tom

Terrible town you live in. Not that any other is any better. I have been chased by monkeys a lot of times .. never bitten though.
But then over a period of time I realized that they were equally scared or something .. so I avoided any eye contact and ignored them as much as I could. That was back home. Sigh ....

In Delhi you hardly find any monkeys hardly any trees only people looking into each others windows for spectacles. An extremely hot lady has moved in recently.

And heres a spectacle especially for you-


aditya said...

And this one too-


TC said...


The first spectacle, a bit heart-rending. The begging monkeys appear considerably more intelligent than the beggar prompting them to perform, and I found myself wishing to see the roles reversed -- them holding the leash, him jumping through the hoops and being laughed at.

As for the monkey riding bareback on the goat, at least he seems to be offering a bit of grooming help, and all in all, the goat looks no more than mildly annoyed.

It's the people behind these and for that matter any "cute animal tricks" that are the bother.

Although in the case of trained attack dogs, there's little trickery to be seen and certainly nothing cute. Just the "training", and the slavering teeth sunk into the bone, whether of perp, terror suspect or innocent victim. A weapon is not an ethical agent.

ACravan said...

No, a weapon is not an ethical agent. My only close experiences with monkeys were, I must say, "cute," and both involved theft. Once a long time ago, in the Central Park Zoo in Manhattan, a Capuchin monkey reached from his cage and snatched my Coca-Cola. Around the same time in life, while visiting Morocco, a monkey who had a highly intelligent look on his face and undeniable personal charm stole my sunglasses. (I was holding them; having them taken from my face probably would have induced apoplexy.) Somewhere I know there's still a Moroccan monkey looking good in a pair of tortoise-shell Ray-Ban Wayfarers. Curtis

TC said...

Just imagine what those Ray-Bans may have looked on in the years since, Curtis.

Makes one think of Ozymandias, a bit, perhaps. The dusts of time blowing across the unremembering ergs & c.

aditya said...

Very true Tom.

Animal amuse abuse ..

Afterall in many ways the zoo is a cute trick too. Every Ray Ban is a payback.
While posting the comments I was reading the following-

To laugh at something is
always to deride it, and the life which, according to Bergson, in laughter breaks through the
barrier, is actually an invading barbaric life, self- assertion prepared to parade its liberation
from any scruple when the social occasion arises. Such a laughing audience is a parody of
humanity. Its members are monads, all dedicated to the pleasure of being ready for anything at
the expense of everyone else. Their harmony is a caricature of solidarity.

Moment s of happiness are without laughter ..

There is laughter because there is nothing to laugh at.

And there are five year old kids in there who'll grow up into god knows what.