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Wednesday, 4 July 2018

Grilling y Espuma en la boca (A Traditional Fourth)

.


Pop singer Miley Cyrus performs "Party in the U.S.A.", wearing black hotpants suit and a denim vest, atop a luggage cart, at the Rose Garden in Portland, Oregon, as part of her 2009 Wonder World Tour: photo by calm down love, 14 September 2009

Grilling is a thing
I don't think
     I'll be doing
on this patriotic holiday.

Murican Triumphalism 
Unh unh

The 33,000+ acres 
    ("achers", as the faux
            indigenes,
proprietors,
    preliterate kings and queens
 of the rootless disposable
West, beginning to feel the
  climate 
         breakdown 
            pain, call 'em) 
incinerated
         so swiftly
              in the Yolo fire
   whirlwind
last weekend, were home
         to so many critters 
who did not get to go home
after the drifter
     dude who was grilling
            set half nocal all
up in smoke
but who cares about critters
    x cept when grilling
em. Fire pit, patriotic murican
institution.

Ah most odious 
        and noisome
of all th'annoying
           Murican
pretend holidays!

Ok now though
let's think positive thoughts
        and get back to grilling.

A lot of people like burnt
A lot of people like rare
A lot of people like almost raw
a lot of people like feeling that juice
 dribbling down their face
    and slurping it off
with their tongues
       said the guy on foxports. 

Oh and then he forgot
          neglected
oh why did he leave that fire
             pit uncovered
when all he had to do was lay
that big ol' metal grate
           over it
              but we know
grillers b rill-men
                   rill-men
come strapt w firestarter
  inna squirt can
        squirt w controlled
abandon 
prefer to brave the flames
      naked handed
          ball-capped
   abhor oven mitts
believe it
              rill-men
eschew asbestos lined gloves 
      never so weak
as to resort to napkin 
    whether pape
            or cloth
wipe great animal viscera 
        staind paws on fake chef
aprons energetically
  untidily
laugh like bears if bears could laugh ha ha ha
laugh at bears ha ha hmwaoooah!
     hate to submit to grates
        'n other safety features
grates 
   make rill-men feel oddly
             unmanly
    feel less than rugged
       butt hurt
and like Miley might not be
   coming over later 
w her baby ho posse
                so cray
           to jump tramp 
       oline 'n drop mentos
   in diet coke
         or pepsi
and make it fizzzz up
             'n explode
Espuma en la boca
            in her cutoffs
on the back of a pickup truck
with a flat 
      mounted .50, long
barrel, aircooled, full
        360 muzzle 
            rotation, swivel
action, three quarter
                  inch armor
 spring recoil buffer, steel
    bolted 6' x 4'
            home welded
shield plate. 


collect call. niland, ca. 2018. | by eyetwist

collect call. niland, ca.2018: photo by eyetwist, 10 February 2018

Passing Views 2 | by pni

Ranchos de Taos, New Mexico 2018 | by Don Hudson

Ranchos de Taos, New Mexico: photo by Don Hudson, 4 May 2018
  
File:Kyle-cassidy-weird-al-yankovic.jpg

Weird Al Yankovic, author and performer of the 2011 parody song "Party in the CIA": photo by Kyle Cassidy, n.d.; image by J Milburn, 8 June 2013

File:Diet Coke Mentos.jpg

Diet Coke and Mentos geyser: photo by Michael Murphy, 18 February 2007



Probably the most fun we'll have all summer!! Diet Coke and Mentos exploding from our mouths hahahagaga: photo by Becky Cheaney (Farley) (becksorange), 30 June 2012

 


Diet Coke and Mentos experiment 1. Next time: the large bottle, or holes in lids of small bottles. Volume to nozzle size turns out to be critical: photo by Cyn Virtue, 14 May 2012


4th of July 2012: photo by Jeff James (Awesoman), 4 July 2012


File:Traubensaft Schaum 1.JPG 

Foam (Schaum, from Latin spuma) from sparkling grape juice. Foam is created when gas bubbles are enclosed by solid or liquid walls photo by Friedrich Böhringer, 3 April 2009


File:Espuma 847.jpg

Espuma de cerveja (beer foam)
: photo by Herr Stahlhoefer, 15 July 2008

 

 

Diet Coke and Mentos. A Diet Coke and Mentos eruption (or Diet Coke and Mentos geyser) is a reaction between carbonated beverage and Mentos candies that causes the beverage to spray out of its container. The numerous small pores on the candy's surface catalyze the release of carbon dioxide (CO2) gas from the soda, resulting in the rapid expulsion of copious quantities of foam. Although any carbonated beverage will produce a similar effect, the reaction was popularized using Diet Coke for seemingly producing the best results: photo by Matthew Woitunski, 26 October 2012



Mentos + Diet Coke. 104 bottles of Diet Coke each had a Mentos dropped in: photo by Navid Baraty, 4 May 2008

 

Coke-Mentos stunt
. Vinnie gets a faceful: photo by Ruby Skye P. I., 17 August 2010

 

Celebrate (Diet Coke and Mentos... too much fun): photo by Tara (taralees), 14 September 2011



Diet Coke and Mentos Explosion: photo by serff, 4 July 2006

A 17-year-old Honduran mother seeking asylum with her 2-year-old son waits in Mexico after being denied entry by U.S. Customs and Border Patrol in Texas 
17-year-old Honduran mother seeking asylum with her 2-year-old son waits in Mexico after being denied entry by U.S. Customs and Border Patrol in Texas. More photos of those denied at the border: Photo @Lelliottphoto: image via Reuters Pictures @reuterspictures, 3 July 2018


Thousands of Syrians seek refuge near the Israeli-occupied Golan Heights: image via Reuters Pictures @reuterspictures, 3 July 2018


Thousands of Syrians seek refuge near the Israeli-occupied Golan Heights: image via Reuters Pictures @reuterspictures, 3 July 2018


Thousands of Syrians seek refuge near the Israeli-occupied Golan Heights: image via Reuters Pictures @reuterspictures, 3 July 2018



#India An Indian Sikh devotee takes a dip in the holy sarovar (water tank) during heavy rain at the Sikh Shrine Golden Temple in Amritsar. Photo @nanuworld #AFP: image via Frédérique Geffard @fgeffardAFP, 3 July 2018


#Afghanistan A young Afghan fish vendor washes a fish as he waits for customers at his stall along the roadside in Mazar-i-Sharif. Photo @Farshadusyan#AFP: image via Frédérique Geffard @fgeffardAFP, 3 July 2018


#Afghanistan Afghan children carry bags over their shoulder as they collect garbage on the outskirts of Herat province. Photo @hoshangAFP #AFP: image via Frédérique Geffard @fgeffardAFP, 3 July 2018


#Iraq An Iraqi man uses a shovel on dry field in an area affected by drought in the Mishkhab region. Photo @HaidarAfp #AFP: image via Frédérique Geffard @fgeffardAFP, 3 July 2018
 

Missing for 10 days, young soccer team found alive in Thailand cave complex: image via Reuters Pictures @reuterspictures, 3 July 2018


These are the real pictures of the boys that have been trapped in the cave at #ThamLuang #Thailand. They look very good and happy to have been found. Photos via @BieBie_Ying: image via Antique Time @AntiqueTime, 2 July 2018



These are the real pictures of the boys that have been trapped in the cave at #ThamLuang #Thailand . They look very good and happy to have been found. Photos via @BieBie_Ying: image via Antique Time @AntiqueTime, 2 July 2018



These are the real pictures of the boys that have been trapped in the cave at #ThamLuang #Thailand . They look very good and happy to have been found. Photos via @BieBie_Ying: image via Antique Time @AntiqueTime, 2 July 2018
Note from god | by efo

Note from god | Near Purgatory Mountain, Virginia: photo by efo, 1 July 2018

Hong Kong, Pied Piper of Hamelin | by Edas Wong

 Hong Kong, Pied Piper of Hamelin: photo by Edas Wong, 24 June 2018

Hong Kong, Pied Piper of Hamelin | by Edas Wong

 Hong Kong, Pied Piper of Hamelin: photo by Edas Wong, 24 June 2018

Hong Kong, Pied Piper of Hamelin | by Edas Wong

Hong Kong, Pied Piper of Hamelin: photo by Edas Wong, 24 June 2018

Hide | by Jeffrey De Keyser

Hide | Bologna (Italy): photo by Jeffrey De Keyser, 28 December 2016
 
Untitled | by chrjs.0510

Untitled: photo by Chu Việt Hà, 1 July 2018

Untitled | by chrjs.0510

Untitled: photo by Chu Việt Hà, 1 July 2018

Untitled | by chrjs.0510


Warszawa PKP | by Borys Nieśpielak


Herons at the Market | by juliehrudova

Herons at the Market [Amsterdam]: photo by Julie Hrudova, 26 April 2014

Tunnel | by juliehrudova

Jump [Nijmegen, Holland]: photo by Julie Hrudova, 13 April 2015

... | by Fermin Guzman
  
... | CDMX 2018 [Tabacalero, Mexico City, Distrito Federal]: photo by Fermin Guzman, 30 June 2018

... | by Fermin Guzman
  
... | CDMX 2018 [Tabacalero, Mexico City, Distrito Federal]: photo by Fermin Guzman, 30 June 2018

... | by Fermin Guzman

... | CDMX 2018 [Tabacalero, Mexico City, Distrito Federal]: photo by Fermin Guzman, 30 June 2018

6 comments:

TC said...

Miley Cyrus: Party in the USA (2010)

Weird Al Yankovic: Party in the CIA (2011)

TC said...

Roky Erickson: Creature with the Atom Brain (live acoustic) (!!) 1980

Roky Erickson: Night of the Vampire (live acoustic) (!!) 1984

This is the most tender, gentle, sweet and loving song about the world of vampires you will ever hear. Plus Roky means and owns every word and intonation. Roky is the Anti Miley. Genius.

Hilton said...

I vote for "rill-men" to enter the US linguistic universe.

TC said...

I vote for free novichok on hot dogs at comey's barbeque, and no upchucking.

Wooden Boy said...

Novichok all round, I say.

What wrong goddess will step out from that filthy foam?

TC said...

What's this we're hearing now on the down-low about Th'Emp "slated" to appear under cover of Imperial Security and Fleets of Large Black Insufficiently Anonymous Looking Armoured Vehicles @Amesbury Novichok Festival, weekend after next, possibly in company w Special Ambassador Sans Portfolio Nigel Disparage, following the special-relationhip display of ceremonial bio-salutes @Porton Down, all guests to be kitted out in the full glittering Evening Hazmat attire reserved for Very Special Occasions??

Ah the foam that may then flow from th'Ever So Important Unsealed Lips!

Drumpf will ne'er become aware it wasn't Epsom, and who would have the temerity to so inform him? He'll naturally be rocking the White Tie and Golf Attire. And he'll have packed a panoply of those MAGA ballcaps, in all sizes from Gargantuan to merely Far Too Large, on the wardrobe consultant's helpful hint - "Mister Emp Your Highness Sir, these official MAGA caps are so sturdy and multiply useful, you can smash them to bits with a smallish tactical nuclear weapons and then send in an Engineering team to repurpose them into tiny crimson simulacra of those large sun hats, the kind Tessie n her peeps like to have as substitute thin-stemmed-drink-umbrellas, on race days."

Almost worth attempting to live so long, simply to be able to say, in my Last days, It Happened, and I Didn't Know.

We'll doubtless get the Full Report from Piers Morgan however. (Or is it Sir Piers yet we wonder?)